Although today is Ruthie’s two month mark, I want to go back and celebrate Month 1! Since I haven’t yet taken her two month photos, we will play a little catch up.
Meet Ruthie Jeanne. Our bright and beautiful second daughter.
Our first month together was rocky. I often tell others that becoming a mom of two was way harder than becoming a mom of one. I have all these issues with being a second child and try as I might, they play out in our day to day life. My mind is constantly working to make sure that everything is fair. That I do everything the same. That Ruthie knows I love her just as much as Eleanor does.
But then I worry about Eleanor’s feelings. Will she be hurt if I give Ruthie too much attention? Is she jealous? And I find myself holding back with Ruthie to make sure Eleanor knows she is still my little girl.
And back and forth it goes…it’s called Mom Guilt. And if you are a mom you have experienced it. It may not look like this, but it pops up in many different areas.
Ultimately I know that showing Ruthie love is teaching Eleanor how to show love. And I also know that it will never always be fair. But if I set that precedent then my girls will come to expect it. But maybe just maybe if I acknowledge and accept that it won’t always be fair, maybe my girls will also acknowledge and accept it. (fingers crossed)
Ruthie turned one month old on February 19th. She weighed in at exactly 10 pounds and measures in the 75th percentile for weight. Yet only the 25th percentile for height. The entire first month she looked identical to Eleanor- at least to me she did. However, at one month old I am finally recognizing Ruthie’s distinctions. Her eyes are quite different, more almond shaped. And her smile is a gorgeous, giant, open-mouth grin that begins just in the corner as a smirk and works it way around her whole mouth. It is an amazing site to see and at one month old we were starting to get more and more of these.
Her ears are also different. Different from Eleanor’s, but also different from one another. One of them is a little more flat on top and we playfully call it her elf ear. Both ears also have a cute little dimple in them about halfway up.
Oh, and the hair. That beautiful blonde, sometimes red hair. I wonder what color it will be when she grows up. I have to admit, I love Ruthie’s blonde locks so much!
We have several nicknames for her…Peanut (which I don’t like but keeps slipping out of my mouth), Pumpkin, and most often Baby Ru.
I am glad our first month is over. As a mom it is hard to say that. I don’t want to wish away the days. But it was hard. Not for any specific reason. I just didn’t know how to adjust. But I am happy to say that we are past that. I am back to the momma who wishes time would stand still and my babies would never grow up!